This is gonna be a grumpy one, sort of. Be ready.
So for that past 3 days I have been in the studio. So far I have glazed 10 bowls, 8 christmas ornaments and finished up 3 pitchers. I have thrown NOTHING on the wheel, but not for a lack of trying.
I’ve probably attempted to throw over 65lbs of clay on the wheel in the past three days (not all at the same time of course). And all I can think about, the entire time, is my professor.
“That looks fat”
“That form is weak”
“You are a rank amatuer”
“You never try anything new”
“Your marks are boring”
“That lip’s too thin”
“That pot’s too heavy”
“That’s a newbie mistake”
“You need to experiment”
“Why did you do that if you haven’t tested it”
“You need to invent something new”
“You aren’t here to be a production potter”
“You’re going to fail my class if you don’t speed up”
“You should handbuild that”
“Why haven’t I seen a drawing for this”
“Don’t draw things out, just make them up”
“You need to be more aggressive”
With all this running through my head, I have ripped, messed up, or destroyed everything I have attempted to throw in the past week. 10 hours of studio time, wasted because my prof has beaten me to a pulp over the past semester.
Come to think of it, I haven’t met a single teacher at this school who knows how to give positive reinforcement. They all focus on the mistakes, so you never have any idea what you did right. Even when I do get a positive comment it’s double sided. “That looks good, but it would be a lot better if you did this.”
So, I’m not entirely sure what I’m going to do for the rest of this semester. If I can’t figure out how to throw something here soon I’m not going to pass this class. At this point, I don’t really care, but it will make signing up for classes next semester much harder and they might put me on academic probation, which could be a huge pain in the ass.
Wish me luck.